two north east girl molested

I was working at a BPO in Chandigarh when I decided to move back to Delhi, as I thought it was better in terms of career prospects. My friend Daisy, also from Manipur, decided to come with me. We asked friends and relatives to find us a place to rent. KishanYadav of Sikandarpur in Gurgaon agreed to rent us a one-room unit.
“On December 11, 2008, we reached Gurgaon and went to pay Kishan the advance rent. He told us that we could move in now and pay later. The unit was dirty, so we left our luggage there and spent the night at a friend’s place. We went back the next morning and cleaned the entire place. Dog-tired, we crashed out by 10 pm.”


“THE LANDLORD BEAT US”
“At 2 am, there was banging on the door. It was Kishan. He sounded drunk and kept screaming at us to open the door. I was petrified and dialled the police helpline. But when after three tries, there was no response, I called friends. Meanwhile, Kishan broke through a window and forced his way in.Three other men followed. “Daisy and I were hysterical as Kishan and his men beat us black and blue and tried to tear off our clothes. They used their hands and same heavy objects to hit us.We were screaming non-stop, but nobody came to help, ‘though Sikandarpur is well populated.
“While the nightmare was on, three women came in and tried to talk to the men. I seized the opportunity and ran.All I could think of was that I had to go to the police to save our lives. I ran blindly and found a police van. When I returned with the cops, I saw two men holding Daisy while a third was all over her. Kishan was arrested.”

“THE POLICE REFUSED TO FILE AN FIR OUR WAY”
“The police admitted us to Sri Ram Hospital. The next day, accompanied by friends and relatives, we went to file a case. And that’s when the police refused to file our complaint. I reiterated that it was a case of sexual molestation and physical assault, and that the Scheduled Castes and Tribes (Prevention of Atrocities) Act was also applicable. But the sub inspector on duty, Aberaj, treated us like criminals instead! He eventually filed an FIR under Sections 323, 452, 506 and 34 of the Indian Penal Code—everything except what we had specifically asked for. Kishan was released on bail.
“The North East Support Centre came to our aid and pleaded with SI Aberaj to file ihe FIR as per our complaint—to no avail.The Centre then approached Sumit Kuhar, additional deputy commissioner of police, Gurgaon, who assured us that the correction would be made. Nothing has been done till date. We also went to the National Commission for Women, which directed the police to act on the matter immediately?’

“NO MONEY WILL GIVE ME PEACE OF MIND”
The trial has not yet begun, but I’m not giving up. In fact, Kishan said that he would pay for a compromise. But I told him to go to hell; no money will give me back my dignity or peace of mind. I don’t know if I will ever get over the trauma. I still get frightened when I hear noises outside the door at night, and I can’t bear someone walking close behind me.
“Immediately after the incident, my mother came down to be with me. Now, I live close to family and friends. I’m planning to do my masters and am appearing for the all-India nursing entrance exams. But whatever I d, I will ensure that KishanYadav and his cronies are punished!”


Mary was lucky to escape, run into the police and save her friend. She is also fortunate to have a strong support system in her family and friends. The North East Support Centre too has rallied behind her. Here’s what you can do if you’re ever in a similar situation.

FILE THE FIR IN WRITING
Dr Kiran Bedi, India’s first woman IPS officer, believes it is essential to file an FIR, because “It will set the process in motion. Sections of law to be applied can be changed. Lodge a report in. your handwriting so that your words aren’t changed. Describe everything— his clothes, the time, location and events—and ask the police to convert it into an FIR. Take a written acknowledgement from the police and keep a copy of your handwritten FIR as it will help you recall the events when the trial begins.”

SAVE YOURSELF
“What Mary did shows real courage and strength,” says Nandini Rao, manager, violence intervention team, Jagori. “She had the presence of mind,
not only to escape, but also to make sure the police rescued her friend.” Nandini says Mary’s actions are almost “textbook classic” in steps to take.
• Get away from the attackers.
• Go back and help anyone who is also being attacked.
• Get medical help as soon as possible.
• Get your support system in place ASAP. This could mean friends, family, neighbours, passers-by, women’s groups and police.
• After your safety is ensured, decide on your long-term plan of action.
• Once the immediate trauma is dealt with, get personal help from family.
• Professional help is also necessary to deal with the aftermath of the trauma.
• Go on with normal life as that too helps in the healing process.
• Be part of a support group for survivors of violence.


VISIT A RAPE INTERVENTION CRISIS CENTRE
“Even though Mary wasn’t raped, such cases have many aspects—social, physical, psychological-and each has to be dealt with by experts, especially when the police are trying to shield the culprits,” says Dr Rajat Mitra, director, Swanchetan Society for Mental Health, Delhi. “Rape intervention crisis centres help the victim deal with the trauma, guide her in how to go forward and motivate her to fight it out to the end:’

DON’T BLAME YOURSELF
Self-blame and self-pity are to be avoided, says DrVinita Malhotra Jha, a Gurgaon-based psychiatrist. “Symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorders include nightmares, dizziness, palpitations, etc. But remember, this is not the end—why should you give up because of one ugly situation?” DrVinita emphasises the need to talk to someone close. “Sometimes there’s fear and resentment towards men in general, so seek help, go to an NGO or a counsellor for support.”

Share

Blogger Widgets